my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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