He kissed a someone with a penis
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Somewhere out there, on several phones belonging to strangers, exists a video of me rapping Baby Got Back on stage in four inch heels that I stole from the drag queen. Also I made out with the chick with the octopus tattoo.
You have the best birthdays
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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