party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
Randomize
