I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
You would seriously think I would remember who put themselves in my phone as Burt Rynalds Moustache, but I don't. And I need to be reminded of who you are so I can give you a proper high five.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize