I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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