And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.