Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize