Michael Bay diarrhea
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize