You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
