Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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