Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Randomize
