Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
