Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
