You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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