I'm eating all of the evidence.
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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