Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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