I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize