There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
