oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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