Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
