she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
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