Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
