im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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