Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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