He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
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