Whod you bang
There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
