what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
