I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I am naked and annoyed.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize
