your thong is hanging out like whoa
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..
What did u do?
turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
