i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
