I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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