yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
