I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
