he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Randomize
