I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
Randomize
