i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I need to align my fucking chakras
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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