Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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