Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
