Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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