its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
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