If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
