I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
