If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
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