this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
lets start a swedish sibling band together
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
