I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
there's a picture of you and pauly shore at a starbucks on my phone
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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