Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
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I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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