UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
All the doctor said was why
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
