Yo dont text me then not text me
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize