He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
