I think my vagina is haunted
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
It was confusing and full of hummus
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
