those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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